Losing weight isn't about willpower

I used to think losing weight was all about willpower. I figured if I had enough willpower, I would be able to stick to a diet, resist fattening foods and eventually slim down.

But time and again I didn't have the willpower, and I did eat the foods I wasn't supposed to. It didn't matter what diet I was on, if it was just one of my own creations or something I was following out of a book.

It was pretty demoralizing. I would make a new starts at losing weight with a strict resolutions of no 'cheating'. Then when I would break my diet and splurge on foods that were off-limits I would feel guilty and a complete failure. I would mentally beat myself up about my pathetic lack of self-control. That sort of thinking doesn't exactly empower one's self esteem! I would end up in thinking place of: I am fat (therefore ugly) and useless.

All I can say is, thank goodness I didn't give up. Because eventually I found this way of losing weight (and actually maintaining!) where willpower just didn't come into it. It was only recently that it dawned on me of why this is.

Previous to this way of eating, it was quite common for me to really crave something sweet after lunch and dinner - chocolate, cookies, and cake were top of the list (potato chips weren't too far behind!)

The nutrition programme set out for me is one that feeds my body - it gives my body the fuel and nutrients it requires to function properly. In really basic terms: I eat the right food at the right time. Because my body is always fueled-up, I don't get cravings. When it is getting close to a meal or snack time, I am looking forward to my healthy food. And after I've had a meal, I feel satisfied and full. I don't feel like having anything sweet or munching on anything else. I can keep chocolate and cookies in the house and I don't feel like eating them - in fact, I don't even think about them.

I always thought that trying to eat this healthy all of the time would make me really want to eat treat foods. I thought I would feel so deprived that I would never last a week eating this way let alone 5 years! I can see the irony now that eating healthy actually makes me want to eat healthy! Losing weight is not about willpower at all - it is about fueling the body with the right food at the right time.

Sickness + no exercise = no free meal

This past week my son and I were struck down by the nasty Rotavirus. While my son copped the worst of it with vomiting and diarrhea, I only spent a day in bed achy muscles, zero appetite and no energy. Unfortunately with viruses, they take their toll on the body and it does require recovery time.

That means I haven't exercised in about a week. I am not worried about that, I prefer to rest and recover properly than leaping back into exercise too soon and weakening my system.

However, it is this very situation that caused me to gain weight over the past 8 months. I would get a flu or cold, stop exercising BUT keep eating my free meal (actually I was enjoying free weekends back then). As my nutritionist says, 'you have to earn your free meals' ... and that is done through exercising.

So, no free meals for me until I start exercising again. This is very motivating! I am feeling better already! Truly. It is actually quite easy to lie in bed in the morning and think, 'hmmm, I should really give this thing one more day of rest to really get it out of my system.'

I was recently given some lovely organic lemons, this brought on a hankering for my favourite lemon slice recipe. I think tomorrow will be a great day to start walking again especially if I want to be eating that lemon slice this weekend!

The scale does my head in

I don't get on a scale at home. We do own a scale, but it is presently gathering dust behind our bathroom sink.

Getting on a scale completely does my head in. I get that 'ugh' feeling before I step on it ... what is that number going to be? Then I do step on it, and if it isn't the number I am expecting, it completely throws me off.

If the number is too high - above the weight I should be - then I go into semi-panic mode. Whhhhhy have I gained weight? And then I think back to every morsel I have put in my mouth, every lick of exercise I've managed since the last time on the scale, and still I struggle with why that number has increased. Then because there has been an increase, no matter how slight, I have to start working on a plan to get that number back down.

On the other hand, if the number is lower than I was expecting. Well, it is celebration time! I am looooosing weight! Therefore I can eat MORE. I can have treats. In fact, I shall go have a cookie right now because I am obviously just skinny by nature.

See what I mean? The scale does my head in - I have crazed thoughts.

So, the only time I get on a scale is when I visit my nutritionist for a check-in. There is still some trepidation when I go to stand on it, but I know I'm in good hands and she can deal with whatever number pops up. Sometimes the number on the scale is more than my previous visit, but amazingly I have lost some fat. That always gets me. Usually it means my lean body mass is up a bit or I am retaining fluid. I am grateful I have her to explain this to me. If I was at home, it would be tail-spin city - and for no reason!

While I am fairly level-headed with most aspects of maintaining my weight, I think the scale is just too ingrained as the enemy. I try to keep as far away from the things as possible. I don't actually take a lot of notice of what my weight might be at any one time. I go by how my clothes are fitting. My jeans are a great indicator! As soon as they start feeling a bit tight or that fat roll above my waist band starts hanging over a bit too much, I know I need to change a few things with my eating and exercise.

So, while the scale is a handy instrument at the nutritionist's, I prefer not to be a slave to one at home, and this works pretty well for me.

"I want to eat whatever I want and still be skinny"

"I want to eat whatever I want and still be skinny." I remember saying that. I was convinced it was possible. I see skinny people eating ice cream, chips, french fries, chocolate, meat pies, doughnuts, hamburgers all the time! Surely it is just mind over matter?? Like, if I think I am skinny then I will be skinny.


Well, it has taken me about 20 years to work out that I am just not naturally skinny. My metabolism isn't geared that way. If I don't want to carry an extra 20+ pounds around, then I have to eat a certain way. I have been through much pain to find this out: countless diets, rigorous exercise regimes and many pairs of jeans - fat, then skinny, fat, then skinny.


It wasn't until I started on this nutrition programme that I really realised what it takes to keep my body at this weight. It was like a BFO (Blinding Flash of the Obvious). I have to eat this way every day - day in day out - to stay this weight. I am NOT like other skinny people who can just chow down on a hamburger and french fries whenever I want. I can't just grab a chocolate bar and a soda for lunch. I can't eat pizza for dinner three nights a week. I can't even have fatty salad dressing or butter with my vegetables at dinner. I just can't do that and maintain this weight.


It sounds like a foodie's worst nightmare - a lifetime of diet food. But, thank goodness, there is a beacon of light to this food programme: My Free Meal! I can eat all of the above-mentioned foods ... I just have to be a bit patient and have my free meal at the right time. It is not difficult. It just requires some discipline. I would say just about everyone is capable of it because we all practice discipline in different areas of our lives such as setting the alarm clock and getting out of bed to go to work, loading the dishwasher after dinner, or mowing the lawn on the weekend. All that stuff takes discipline. Unless you are one of the few people who loooove doing dishes, you kinda have to make yourself do those things.


Well, that's how I feel about my food programme. I have to make myself to do it. Which means, eat clean all week - Monday through Friday. Certainly I am not starving! Far from it. I eat healthy, tasty, wholesome foods all week. Then on Saturday evening I can eat whatever I want. Yep, I can finally say those words and have them be true for me! I can eat whatever I want and still be skinny.

Recipe: sweet and sour fish

This is a delicious, low/no-fat, low-carb way to enjoy fish!

Sweet & Sour Fish (serves 2)

300g white flesh fish
1/4c flour
1 tablespoon fish sauce
2 tablespoons soy sauce
juice of one lemon
1/4 c warm water
1 tablespoon brown sugar
2 plates full of your favourite steamed vegies in bite-size pieces

Cut fish into large bite-size pieces, check for bones. Coat fish in flour. In a small bowl mix all other ingredients (except vegies), making sure the sugar dissolves. Heat large fry pan on medium, dry-fry fish pieces until they are almost cooked through. Pour sauce mixture over fish and remove from heat. Let stand only 15-20 seconds, serve immediately by spooning over plates of steamed vegetables. Note: the sauce mixture ingredients can be adjusted to suit your tastes.

Unexpected benefits of exercise

I'm not really a huge fan of exercising. I'd much rather sit in my comfy recliner, drink tea and read a book than exercise. But I do enjoy walking. And if the sea water in Auckland was as warm as in Hawaii, I'd probably enjoy swimming too.

But this winter I discovered some additional benefits to exercising (besides just keeping the metabolism up and running):

1. I stay warmer. Earlier this winter I really felt the cold and often had cold hands and feet. Now that I am exercising regularly 4-5 days each week, I don't seem to get cold.

2. I fall asleep easier. I think this is due not only to the physical exercise but also because I am getting up an hour earlier than I was previously. So, when I finally hit the sack at 10 or 10:3opm I fall asleep pretty fast. Prior to this, I was really struggling with falling asleep. Probably 3-4 nights a week I'd lay in bed for 2 hours before finally nodding off.

These additional benefits give me the extra motivation I need to get out of my warm, cosy bed when it is still dark outside and get out into the chilly weather for my walk.

5 months' triathlon training & not an ounce lost!

Back in 2004 I had an epiphany ... I would do triathlons and those 20 pounds of fat would just fall off of me. My proof and shining example of this realistic thought was a woman I met through my business referral group. Her name was also Lisa ... she was super-fit and had a gorgeous, lean body. Her secret, I knew, was that she trained hard and competed in triathlons.

So, with this goal set, off I went. I trained by myself for a couple months, but I didn't really know what I was doing and didn't seem to make any progress (or lose any weight, ha!) So I paid Lisa's partner, Roger, who trained reasonably normal people to compete in ironmans, to coach me.

I started my training regime set out by Roger in July 2004. He had me exercising every day of the week. I swam and ran Mondays and Wednesdays, biked on Tuesdays and Sundays and swam and biked on Fridays. Thursdays were not a day off ... I tramped for four hours with my club on those days.

I worked hard with my training. I think I did my first event - a sprint triathlon after 3 months of training. This was 750m swim, 20km bike and 5km run. It was tough for me although the swimming was a breeze (my strong point), biking and running not so great.

Anyway, while I had accomplished much with my training in terms of fitness and actually competing in my first event ... I had not lost a single ounce. I was working my butt off but my butt was still all there!

By November, when my friend told me about her nutritionist, I was desperate and totally motivated to have her help.

The reason I wasn't losing any weight, she told me, even though I was training so hard was because I was not eating enough food or the right kinds of foods to feed my body. It had gone into 'emergency mode' with all that exercise and was hanging on to every bit of fat for its dear life.

When I followed Ginny's programme, the weight fell off effortlessly. Now I know that simply walking several times a week is enough to keep my metabolism working - no need for that hard slog! I don't miss it a bit!